To Fix Students’ Bad Behavior, Stop Punishing Them
In classrooms across the world, misbehavior is an ever-present challenge. From minor disruptions like talking out of turn to more severe infractions like fighting or defiance, bad behavior can derail learning and exhaust teachers. For decades, the standard response has been clear: punish the students until they stop. Detentions, suspensions, expulsions, zero-tolerance policies — these have been the tools of choice. But what if the very strategies meant to fix bad behavior are actually making it worse?
Research, classroom experience, and growing real-world examples suggest a radical idea: to truly address students’ misbehavior, schools need to stop punishing them and start understanding them. By replacing punitive discipline with restorative, supportive, and relational approaches, educators can help students build the skills they need to behave better — and create classrooms where everyone can thrive.
The Trouble with Punishment
At first glance, punishment seems logical. If you break a rule, there are consequences. If the consequences are unpleasant enough, you won’t break the rule again. This mirrors the “carrot and stick” mentality many adults grew up with.
However, decades of research in psychology and education show that punishment rarely works the way adults hope it will. In fact, it often backfires.
For starters, punishment might stop unwanted behavior in the short term, but it does little to teach students what to do instead. For example, a student who disrupts class because they don’t understand the material might be sent to detention. But detention doesn’t help them master the lesson — it just removes them from the classroom, increasing their chances of falling even further behind and acting out again.
More seriously, harsh discipline disproportionately affects marginalized students. Studies show that Black students, students with disabilities, and students from low-income families are far more likely to receive suspensions or expulsions than their peers — even for the same infractions. This contributes to the so-called “school-to-prison pipeline,” where students pushed out of classrooms are more likely to drop out and end up entangled in the criminal justice system.
Worse still, when students feel targeted or excluded by school discipline, they are more likely to disengage from school altogether. Punishment breeds resentment and alienation, not responsibility and community. It erodes trust between students and teachers — and without trust, learning suffers.
Why Kids Misbehave
To understand why punishment fails, it helps to understand why students misbehave in the first place. Contrary to what some might believe, most students don’t disrupt class because they want to be “bad.” They act out for a variety of reasons — and many have little to do with willful defiance.
Some students struggle with self-regulation. A child with ADHD might call out answers impulsively, not to disrespect the teacher but because they genuinely find it difficult to wait their turn. Others may be dealing with stress or trauma at home — a parent’s illness, food insecurity, unstable housing. These burdens can manifest as irritability, defiance, or withdrawal.
In other cases, students act out to get their needs met. A child who feels unnoticed might misbehave to gain attention, even if it’s negative attention. A student who doesn’t understand the lesson might disrupt class to avoid the embarrassment of being called on.
When schools respond with punishment, they ignore these root causes. They address the symptom — the bad behavior — but not the underlying need. It’s like giving cough drops for a lung infection: the symptom might subside briefly, but the real problem festers.
Restorative Practices: A Better Way
So what can schools do instead? Increasingly, educators are turning to restorative practices — an approach that focuses on repairing harm, rebuilding relationships, and fostering accountability through understanding, not exclusion.
Restorative practices encourage students to reflect on how their behavior affects others and to take responsibility for making things right. Instead of suspending a student for fighting, a teacher might facilitate a restorative circle, where the student meets with the person they hurt, listens to how their actions impacted others, and works together on a plan to repair the harm.
Restorative practices don’t mean ignoring bad behavior. They mean addressing it in a way that teaches students empathy, communication, and problem-solving skills — all essential for life beyond school.
Schools that adopt restorative approaches often see dramatic results. For example, in Oakland, California, schools that implemented restorative justice programs saw suspensions drop by more than 50% and graduation rates climb. In Denver, restorative practices reduced suspensions by 40% and decreased repeat offenses. Instead of pushing students out, these schools kept students connected and invested in their community.
Teaching Skills, Not Just Enforcing Rules
Another key shift is recognizing that behavior is a skill — one that must be taught and practiced like any other. Just as we wouldn’t punish a student for not knowing algebra before teaching it, we shouldn’t punish them for not knowing how to manage anger or resolve conflict without giving them the tools to do so.
Social-emotional learning (SEL) has emerged as an effective way to build these skills. SEL programs teach students how to identify emotions, manage stress, set goals, show empathy, and make responsible decisions. Classrooms that integrate SEL often see not just better behavior but also higher academic achievement.
Teachers also play a critical role. When educators build strong relationships with students, they can spot early warning signs of trouble and intervene with compassion rather than punishment. They can set clear expectations, model respectful communication, and create safe spaces where students feel seen and valued.
Rethinking the Role of Teachers
This shift from punisher to mentor requires support. Many teachers were trained in systems that prioritized compliance and control over connection. They may feel overwhelmed by the idea of managing a classroom without the threat of detention or suspension.
That’s why professional development is essential. Teachers need training in trauma-informed practices, restorative conversations, conflict mediation, and cultural responsiveness. They also need time and support to build relationships with students — something that is often squeezed out by standardized testing pressures and overcrowded classrooms.
Schools must also prioritize mental health resources. Counselors, psychologists, and social workers can help students and families address the root causes of misbehavior. When teachers have a team to lean on, they are better able to handle challenges without resorting to exclusion.
Addressing the Critics
Critics sometimes argue that eliminating punishment will lead to chaos — that students will run wild if there are no consequences for bad behavior. But this is a misunderstanding. Restorative approaches don’t mean ignoring rules; they mean enforcing them in ways that are fair, consistent, and growth-oriented.
Accountability still exists — but it looks different. Instead of “You’re suspended for three days, go home,” accountability sounds like, “What happened? Who was harmed? How can you fix it? What support do you need to make better choices next time?”
This approach is harder than simply handing out punishments. It takes time, patience, and a willingness to listen. But in the long run, it works better — for students, teachers, and the school community.
A Call to Action
Fixing bad behavior isn’t about cracking down harder. It’s about asking deeper questions: Why is this happening? What does this student need? How can we help them learn a better way?
Schools that make this shift find that discipline becomes less about control and more about community. Students learn that mistakes are opportunities to grow, not reasons to be cast out. Teachers find that their classrooms are calmer, not because students fear punishment, but because they feel respected, heard, and motivated to do better.
The evidence is clear: Punishment alone doesn’t work. Understanding, support, and meaningful accountability do. If we want to fix students’ bad behavior, we have to stop punishing them — and start teaching, listening, and restoring instead.
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